100 Incidents of Being in Love - Manushya Puthiran
After I have been in love with
you, a hundred things have changed or a hundred incidents are taking place in
my life.
1.
I am always
Recounting a
lie
2.
I am awaiting something,
even in sleep
3.
Whenever I go for shopping
I anticipate
that there could be something
You may like
4.
There is always
Something I
need to hide
5.
To board a bus
an auto or
a taxi
I am always waiting,
anxiously
6.
I wonder how even I could
Blush
7.
I trash that which was
Once very
precious to me
8.
I obsess over
Betrayals, always
9.
I fondle my private parts
As if it were
A stranger’s hand
10. I
wilt
In times of
rain
11. I keep
churning out
poetic dialogues
Like a
character
12. I keep
practicing
shades of emotions
Like a thespian
13. I
underline
Lines in books
That I would
quote to you
14. I
am constantly
Proving myself
to you
15. I
always pester
You for
Some proof of
your love
16. Are
you the last person of my life?
I am
bewildered
17. I don’t
keep account
Of my
expenses
As I used to
once
18. I
feel like bursting into tears
Though without
reasons
19. I
feel like laughing out
Though I can’t
find a cause
20. When
I choose my undies
I wonder
whether they suit
Your taste
21. I
find a way of
coupling you with
a line from any song
I happen to
listen
22. I
practise the adventure
Of giving you a full kiss
Unbeknown to a thousand people surrounding
us
23. Amidst
a hundred bystanders
In the blink
of an eye
I hug and slip away
from you
24. I
use a toothpaste
That is
specially flavoured
25. I
use a shampoo
That is
specially perfumed
26. I
use soaps
That have an
unusual aroma
27. I
use perfumes
That have an
unusual scent
28. I
scrutinize myself
In front of
the mirror
Naked
29. wearing
new clothes
I stare at
myself
In front of
the mirror
30. I
obsess over
What you may
be doing
In spaces I don’t
exist
31. How
would I
Face it if
you pass away suddenly,
I fret over
again and again
32. I
cross the road in a hurry
Speaking to
myself
33. I
love everyone
Without a
reason
34. I
pardon everyone
Without a
reason
35. I
am scared of those
piercing eyes
of yours
36. I
walk with a racing heart
To find a
moment of loneliness
In which I
could think of you
37. After
spending hours
Conversing with
you
I think of
writing you a letter
38. I
panic so much of
Losing my way
39. Is
she leading me
To a path of
self-destruction?
I wonder while
being in your embrace
40. I marvel
over and over at
How I
surrendered myself, so unconditionally,
to you
41. Drunk,
I cry my eyes
out
42. In
a clothes shop
I am
transfixed to a dress
That may look
stunning on you
43. I
notice many
Who resemble
you
44. I
break into laughter
For things not
half laugh worthy
45. For
the first time
I realize
I could
relish a swear word
46. Glancing
at valleys
From mountain
tops
I despair that
You miss them
47. I
wish
You aren’t
aware
of the
insults hurled at me
48. I
wish
You don’t find
out the lies
I tell you only
49. I believe
like crazy
That you are
thinking of me all the time
As I do of
you
50. I
check my phone
Every now and
then
51. I
check your phone
surreptitiously
and return it
in a hurry
52. How
will I cross this mirage of misery?
I despair
53. I
shrink at the
Slightest neglect
54. When
a giant shadow of sorrow engulfs me
I cross it
easily
Holding on to
a faint memory of you
55. I implant
in you so many
Tall tales of
me
56. I am
so vulnerable when
Awaiting your
response to
“Why do you
like me so much?”
57. I wish
I fall sick
So that you
are around
To take care
58. I
am dumbfounded that
You could develop
a liking to
Someone else beside
me
59. I
always think that I must
Take you to a
distant town
And sleep with
you
Without any
trepidation
60. I don’t
tire of
Recounting to
you
A yarn about my
former girlfriend
61. I
only half-understand
The films we
watch together
62. I
crave that
Others should
notice us
63. Whatever
birthday gifts I buy for you
Are either
too low-priced
Or
They do not suit
you at all
64. I
desire to talk about this love
To someone,
to anyone
65. I
wish I could crib of you
To anybody,
to somebody
66. I shed
tears to you over
the wounds of
my youth
though they
have
turned mute
now
67. I
pretend to hold you
Light
Though you
are quite heavy
68. I
fall asleep
While you are
talking
But I could hear
every word you
utter
69. Brightly
lit places
Make me timid
Low light makes
me feel secure
70. Someone
extends
their love to
me
Your
affection’s shadow
makes me mercilessly
reject it
71. I
crave so much
for your
company
In a solitary
trip
72. Who
would inform you
When I pass
away untimely?
I am muddled
73. I mouth
your name
When calling
someone else
74. The
shiny edge
Of a knife
Reminds me of
your tongue
75. In
an ancient temple
Standing in
front of a statue
I am stunned
at the nipples
Exactly as
yours
76. I
dream of
Barging in
When you are changing
dress
77. I
could sense
The smell of
your private parts
At the depths
of water
78. I dislike
your friends
For
no reasons
79. In
this life, I needed you
As a reason
to like me
Don’t I have any
other reason
To like you?
80. To
think of how a beautiful moment between us
Will turn
into just a memory
breaks my
heart
81. I
believe that
The loveable
in you is permanent
And the
hateful in you
is accidental
82. When
you whip me
For my negligible
betrayals
My lust for
you
grows manifold
83. After
I came to know you
I observe
minutely
The bodily
contours of many others
84. I
ask myself many times:
Why should I be
so
yielding to
one?
85. We
come to love
As the water replenishing
a plant
But why does
it suck us dry
Like water
that comes to a sandy surface?
I am puzzled
86. I sense
your eyes upon me
In places you
are absent
87. The
nurses’ hands fondling my head
In a
treatment room
Are like
yours
88. I think
it would have been
Even better
had we met
A few years earlier
89. What
thoughts
keep you
rooted
to this place,
doing nothing?
I am asked
often.
90. Whenever
our tastes differ
I raise my bar
for tolerance
91. Whenever
you conceal
You aversions
for me,
I hold your
hands tightly
92. I
feel so lonely
When it
strikes me that
Living the
greatest love
We are still solitary
beings
93. Every
kind of love
Has its price
Can I pay for
mine?
I am fussing
over all the time
94. Standing
in the presence of God
With hands
joined
I could never
seek anything for me
but for you
95. My
introductions of you
to someone
however I do
it
always end
flawed
96. However
free I am
nowadays
I am always
short of time
97. Daily
I need at least
ten things
to validate the
existence of
this love of
mine
98. When
I think of
How playfully
we began this whole thing
I want to smack
The cheek of
my insanity
99. If
a kiss
Could make my
body so weightless
If a
separation
Could make it
so heavy
Do I possess
this my body at all?
I wonder
100.
The day you poison my drink
I have only
one request,
‘Do I have the
time
to sleep with you one last time?’
Comments
இக்கவிதையின் தமிழ் மூலம் “புலரியின் முத்தங்கள்” தொகுப்பில் உள்ளது. பக்கங்கள் 347-57